The Weekly Three, 5/6/24: Unraveling requires a firm grip.
On remaking your modes of operation to be the support you really need.
This week’s spread is a question. The answer may take some digging, but the way we’ve all been “realizing” lately might make it just a little easier to find.
Like most answer-seeking, the endpoint doesn’t come with the identification of the answer, but with what you’re going to do with that answer (or not do, as you’ll see further down…)
Welcome to The Weekly Three! Each Monday, I share a three-card Tarot spread to help you focus your intuitive energy in real life, and take action with intention inside your business.
I pull these cards with the collective energy of my community in mind, but if you want a custom spread of your very own, you can get it right here.
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In The Cards: What’s holding you back?
The Queen of Wands reversed is restless. Instead of nurturing a creative spark into a steady heat, she pushes that tiny flame too hard, too soon. Maybe the flame goes out, leaving you in the cold. Maybe it catches on the drapes and burns the house down.
Judgement comes and, reversed, you’re not ready. The final transformation being asked of you in order to ascend to the heights of The World, Major Arcana card twenty-one, is rejected. Why are you avoiding what’s necessary?
The Wheel of Fortune is at the bottom of its cycle in this reversed position. Luck feels like it’s run out, like you have to push twice as hard to get the wheel to turn.
In Between: The humbling in the dig.
Last week I sat down with my business coach and was like: “I stalled out.” I had a very clear plan of action, task lists that had been painstakingly broken down into ittiest-bittiest bits for my ADHD and put in a functionally obvious order for my Autism.
And yet: I got stuck in the weeds of my own logistical confusion. The kind of logistical confusion I can so easily pull my own clients out of within minutes.
What was going on?
There is a natural thing that happens for my neurodivergent brain when it comes to certain tasks that can make me stop in my tracks. Am I doing this the way it was intended to be done? Did I misunderstand what was meant? How does one get over this minuscule gap between steps and do it in such a way that it will set the right foundation for the following steps?
Sometimes I really, actually don’t understand. I need very literal direction at times. In corporate, this looked like “can I repeat back to you what I understood so I can make sure it’s what you need me to do?” When I’m coaching my clients, I realize this translates to giving very literal direction in order to make sure a plan or strategy feels clear and doable. But when it comes to my own work, I don’t have a different brain to double-check things with.
Thankfully, my coach was able to quickly make the invisible in-between steps of the process that had confounded me make quick sense.
Even still, I had a lingering feeling of “but, how?”
After a few minutes of playing is-it-this-wait-no-there’s-a-logical-reason-for-that, I realized that what was really happening was that completing these new projects and changing the way my business works was pressing on me. And not just pressing on NOW-me, it was pressing on the me that I was clinging to out of familiar comfort. Patterns that I had put in place to protect myself for years were being called into question, asked to become something else.
It didn’t matter if the directions were literal. It mattered that the literal directions made me have to literally change my approach to life on earth. I had to think differently about myself and my ideas and my worth and my money. If I completed all of the projects in front of me, I would have to be differently.
Acknowledging how uncomfortable and scary that was felt humbling.
Going after your goals and bringing a future vision to life isn’t just about doing, and doing fiercely no less—aggressively, actively, immediately.
It’s about realizing where you feel small. Where you need a workaround until something starts feeling natural. Where you need more support than you think you “should.”
This is not about “feeling the fear and doing it anyway.” As a highly dysregulated and currently burnt out neurodivergent entrepreneur, that phrase does nothing but infuriate me. This is about knowing your own requirements and figuring out how to meet them with what you’ve got. Being able to do that takes stepping out of activity and self-delusion and stepping into the reality of what’s creating the fear in the first place.
Honestly, if you feel the fear, don’t fucking do it anyway. That’s a surefire way of doing something from a place of panic and dysregulation. Why is there fear? Is it warranted? Is it just discomfort and not actual fear? How can you support yourself so that you aren’t scared out of your mind, and instead able to take one supported baby step after another into completely unknown territory until it becomes known enough?
In Your Business: What kind of support do you need?
What did you find last week when you got out your toolbox and started working? Was it perhaps that you can’t “hard work” your way through decades of societal programming, personal beliefs and old patterns?
If that’s the case, what kind of support do you actually need in order to get past whatever is holding you back?
There’s a New Moon tomorrow in abundant, slow, supportive Taurus. Set your intentions with support in mind and see what kind of you comes through the other side.
Until next week,
Zoha
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About The Author:
Zoha Abbas is a Writer, Intuitive Tarot Reader and Business Coach who aims to explore the small business conversations around self-trust, critical thinking, reality checks and forging your (not so straight) path to success in the grey-area of real life. Find out more at zohaabbas.com
For inquiries, please email: zoha@theownershipmethod.com